Just Fine.

I forget sometimes that there are some of you out there still listening.

Still loving.

Thanks, you rock.
**********
I'm not the most perfect person. I make mistakes and often times they're not pretty. I place a pretty high standard on myself for deadlines and projects and updates and schedules. I try not to have those for other people, but can get irritated when people slow my roll.

Sometimes so much that I forget that they're people.

I messed up the other day pretty badly. And apologized profusely. But the person decided that they'd had enough and ended up leaving the show. I'm not proud of this, in the slightest. I hurt them, not intentionally, but with the wrong comment at the wrong moment.

My friends and associates are telling me it's not my fault. That she left because she'd been looking to leave for a while. That she was unreliable, flaky and she should have just gotten over it and accepted my apology. And on some level, I know they're wrong. But here's what I want to know...

Why is it so easy for people to forgive others and not forgive me?

How do I not get crucified every time all I do is just SAY THE WRONG THING? For god's sake, I'm only human. Or are you just upset that I finally spoke up for myself?
I just feel like people refuse, REFUSE to apologize or forgive me. Like, if I'm not perfect, that for some reason I'm not worth being their friend. For crying out loud, I'm only human. If I touched a nerve, and then I apologize, doesn't it mean that you have to get over it.

Well you know what? Doesn't matter to me anymore. See Mary above (hey, it's the 15 year old Penny doing a song lyrics post!):
Let it go……
Can’t let this thing called love get away from you
Feel free right now, going do what you want to do
Can’t let nobody take it away, from you, from me, from we
No time for moping around, are you kidding?
And no time for negative vibes, cause I’m winning
It’s been a long week, I put in my hardest
Gonna live my life, feels so good to get it right

So I like what I see when I’m looking at me
When I’m walking past the mirror
No stress through the night, at a time in my life
Ain’t worried about if you feel it
Got my head on straight, I got my mind right
I aint gonna let you kill it
You see I wouldn’t change my life, my life’s just…..

Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Just fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
You see I wouldn’t change my life, my life’s just fine

Feels so good, when you’re doing all the things that you want to do
Get the best out of life, treat yourself to something new
Keep your head up high
In yourself, believe in you, believe in me
Having a really good time, I’m not complaining
And I’m a still wear a smile if it raining
I got to enjoy myself regardless
I appreciate life, I’m so glad I got mine
So I like what I see when I’m looking at me

I aint gon’ let nothing get in my way
(I ain't gone let nobody bring me down, no, no, no)
No matter what nobody has to say
(No way, no way, no way)
I ain’t gon’ let nothing get in my way
No matter what nobody has to say

Feels so good, when you’re doing all the things that you want to do
Get the best out of life, treat yourself to something new
It’s a really good thing to say
That I won’t change my life, my life’s just fine

Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
Just fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, ooooh
You see I won’t change my life, my life’s just fine