
A couple of months ago, I wrote an entry about my friend's father, Papa Bear. It was on my old site, so it can't be linked currently. Basically, about two years ago, PB was diagnosed and treated for a large brain tumor after collapsing at the police academy. This morning I got an email telling me that the end...is nigh.
The fact that he has lasted this long, in such amazing, lucid, coherent condition is a miracle. He IS love, in it's purest, gentlest, strongest form. He is a father, husband and former police officer. If you ever wanted to find a hero-I would put Papa Bear in as a strong contender. I'm not sure if anything I could say at this moment would be poetic or truly string into words what I feel for this man. But I can tell you a story...about us.
So right around the time Papa started going into the cancer center at Stanford for treatment, he would keep in touch with people via cell phone. One day, I was delighted and surprised to see his name popping up on my phone. I answered:
"Papa Bear? Hi!!"
he was barely intelligible. His normally gruff voice coming out as a whisper calling his wife's name. It was so hard to listen to.
"Papa? Papa? Hi...it's Penny."
"...Penny?"
"Yes, I think you called me by mistake."
"Oh. I wanted to call Mama."
"Ok, do you want me to call her for you?"
"No. I can do it."
"Ok...bye baby."
"Bu-bye."
I called my friend and let him know that Papa was trying to reach Mama, then left to use the restroom. When I got back to my desk, there was a message flashing on my cell phone. Papa Bear had called me back-to APOLOGIZE. For calling me and bugging me at work. Now, remember-this is a stalwart, 60 year old man in the hospital for chemo to treat his incurable brain tumor. Who has a loving wife and 5 kids. Who came to see my play in a wheel chair, who always asks to hear my gospel song at any time of day or night, who loves unconditionally and with grace and humor. He was calling to say sorry to me?
Frankly, they do not make them like this anymore. This current culture puts too much stock in the ironic, the sarcastic, the snark, the jadedness, the cool aloofness that allows the individual to put themselves above others and never fully engage with another. That praises competitive back stabbing and mocks of the compassion of others. The culture that takes pure souls and innocent hearts into a place where they are not allowed to survive if they do not become corrupt themselves. Cultivates: gossip, jealousy and worst of all, apathy. Enough ranting on my part.
This is not a man without flaws by any means, but this is a man who loves and lives in spite of those flaws and by doing so, outstrips any of your typical cultural icons. Thoughts, love and prayers to my adopted family-and to you and yours.