less IS more

Broke these bad boys in today at Wicked. Walked from the house to the bank to the train and then around the Orpheum. Um...and they are COMFORTABLE! This is such a new development for me. I'm so used to my shoes being ridiculously uncomfortable upon first try, that these sweet little wedges were a revelation. But my toesies are still intact and no shin splints. Might be the new go-to footwear. Added plus? I got them thrifted for $17.50. And they were brand new Steve Madden. w00t!
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Here's a question for those of you who are interested in those sorts of things (in light of the above blurb, slightly hypocritical):

Do you feel that in the current economy, you've been doing so much downsizing (of expenses, consumption etc.) that when you actually do some legitimate spending/eating...you start to feel sick?

So today, I went to see Wicked at the Orpheum as a belated b-day present from my aunt. The tickets were balcony, but they were center front row - so they were totally awesome. As an early b-day present for my cousin, I got us both hoodies. And then afterwards we went to Max's for dinner. And I literally felt sort of sick eating there. Not that the food isn't great, but there's just so much of it. And I thought about all the consumption I've been doing this weekend. Friday had a carbo load glut with pizza and garlic bread at lunch, cake afterwards and then goat cheese stuffed beignets for dinner. Saturday was sitting on my ass and included lots of noodles and potato salad. I literally feel like I have to consume only water for the next couple of days. And purge myself of purses and shoes.

I've gotten used to the minimalism of the past few months. Of the simplicity of no coffee or a simple house drip. Of not eating the breakfast pastries. Of walking to work every day. Of saving instead of spending. Of conserving instead of wasting. Of asking myself, "Do you NEED this?" and if the answer is "no" then passing on it.

And genuinely enjoying the new thrifty me.

And yet, I find myself slowly falling into my old patterns of spending too much and not saving enough. Eating out. Shopping, spending way too much on overpriced items. And feeling, for lack of a better word, disgusted with myself. I know we all need to allow ourselves our little luxuries. But hey, if my parents could do without, so can I. It's ok to order a salad for dinner if that's all I feel like eating. (Especially if someone else is paying) It's ok to spend the entire day drinking water from the tap. And it's ok to not have the same things that my friends have. Because if they're going to judge me on what shoes I wear, what bag I carry or what clothes I have on my back - they probably weren't good friends in the first place.

I need to go back to the feeling of need. Instead of the feeling of want.